Rambling again…
I saw the gals for iftar and a trip to sma to check out the degree programme the have there. I kept repeating 20 thousand dollars much the the chagrin of the ladies. There was ms. Mar the young and ambitious librarian. Then there was giggly and very much tickly ms.nadiaH who came JUST in time for ifthar and of course our jaunts will not be complete with ms. Sanee the seriously insane policewoman in disguise as a paper crazy student *mueheheh* who came like at 730pm and saved me from seriously ransacking next door 711 for a blarrdy lighter. Yeaps….yours truly has started her smoking BUT I am very much trying to lay it low. Because yes..after that bout of being seriously ill, we all need to take care of ourselves a wee much better :D we had a lousy and noisy iftar at tong seng just opposite bugis but it was nice to meet up and fire the rage of enthusiasm for higher learning. For all the reasons we all have for taking up the diploma and contemplating the degree programme it was nice to humble oneself and bask in the ideal glory of others. Refreshing to say the least, because suddenly not making sense was serious making a lot of sense.
We all suddenly wondered aloud why each of us is doing the deed. Switching from a diploma programme to a degree is serious major mojo to contend with. Then a sudden epiphany! From current book in bag, “ It would be sane now NOT to be an emperor of one idea; to start from the position that everyone is right from their own point of view; and to take for granted that everyone is more confused than they seem. Havoc is always wrecked in fast cures for confusion. The sane believe that confusion, acknowledged, is a virtue; and that humiliating another person is the worst thing we ever do. Sanity should not be our word for the alternatives to madness; it shoud refer to whatever resources we have to prevent humiliation.” – Adam Phillips, Going Sane. A bit of truth there? Aren’t we all the selfish bastards we are born to be? But hey! We shouldn’t go crazy for wanting and desiring for meaning. Please let’s not bring genetics into this or religion! I am trying to stay coherent here *haha!*
But it was the lingering question of the nazi’s and their past brutality that clinked and d clanked much in my brains. I did read about those Nazi experiemnts. All those senseless and nasty evil ones they did on the jews. What was their motive? Why so extreme?! And so creative some more..but on the whole it was the mental experiments that lasted throuhout history and how it premeated layers upon layers of people and not only of jewish descendants nor of origins. It affected us colelctively and universally, most definitely. I once read, Victor Frank’s book ‘Man’s Search for Meaning' while doing research on Logos. 'Logos’ is the the greek word for ‘meaning’ and found it very rewarding. It was a gripping account of his time in a Nazi concentration camp and of his fellow prisoners who either devloped a survival mindset or simply gave up on life. Frankl apprecaited the multidimensional nature of humans and while he didn’t deny that biology or conditioning shapes us, he insisted that there is room for free will. We are able to choose to develop certain values or aprituclar course in life, or to retain our dignity in difficult situtations. Excerpts:-“What I term the existential vacuum constitutes a challenge to psychiatry today. Ever more patients complain of a feeling of emptiness and meaninglessness, which seems to derive from two facts. Unlike an animal, man is not told by instincts what he should do. Often he does not even know what he basically wishes to do. Instead, he either wishes to do what other people do (conformism), or he does what other people wish him to (totalitarism).” So as not to confuse his theory with the existentialsim of Sartre or Camus, Frankl wanted to convince people that life will always have meaning. Even if it is not yet clear what it is. We may not discern or pick on a its meaning in difficult or painful situations until later, when we have grown as a result of what happened. Easier said than done when in this age and time what we all chase after is ‘closure’ the simplicity of having it done and away with. Its over, NADA…KAPISH! But how many of us take the time to think about the courage, the quiet strength of sitting it through. Of bawling ones eyes out and feeling better that you did because you realised that through it all…you are still alive. Each person, he wrote, comes into life with a unique set of potential meanings to fulfill. It is up to us whether we decide to grasp these meanings and accept them, or try to avoid them. There is no ultimate “meaning of life” or why we want to do or have to do. Only individual meanngs of lives of individual people. And boy did I have a headspin while I was sick. But bleak situations don’t necessarily do that. A perfect sunrise could give you the inspiration to hunt for many more. A soft blowing breeze may whet your appetite for the chill of the mountains? Be careful of bears or rather monkeys then. If you are like most Singaporeans and have only encountered animals in the zoo *hehe* so how the hell all this get tied with and into the jews and the nazi’s and concentration camps? Errr….blame it on the trailing effects of the drugs :p but *ahemssss* please do a twirl and ask youself if we are not living in a Nazi camp right now ;)
So even though muddleheaded and very much so disorientated last weekend. The sleep, the rest and okay the drugs helped to bring back a sense of equilibrium that I so desire. The zest is slowly creeping up and although I see no meaning in episodes of humiliation I see and taste at work, I am reminded yet again, how fragile we each hold our lives on tether to. And what for? The concious acceptance of suffering or fate can be transformed into one of our greatest achievements. So the nazi’s….didn’t they have anything better to do than meddle with other people’s minds? Believe it or not but the legacy of the nazi’s tortures are still very much alive. Subtley it has premeated our daily lives in silence and killing every little nuace of free will we have. Any oppressive enviroment will do just that. Kill you softly or gently with much worry about freedom of speech, healthcare and the care of the aged. In midst of the young chasing after paper after paper, our natural compassionate nature to understand and give support without prejudice is slowly but steeply eroding our sense of humanity. So onward we march gals!! There is yet much to acclaim for. Don’t let the numbers or time and critism bog you down. What matters most is that you empower yourself with the tools and stay determined on course to do what every little thing we can to make this life better for everyone. The point of melding what you have with what you want to apply to life is tricky but we will all get to the point soon enough. See you guys for another round of serious and not so serious mental jaunts before class. And be the riot you are! No one cares really :p we have the law on our side *points to ms.sanee* albeit she can be very ham-sup or seriously uncensored for your both very young ears. But that is life….all about preparation darls. We all are going to die but how we will end it ultimately can still be a choice. None but your’s…..errrm…..okay I think I’m a bit off here but we can shove it in more next next Thursday?
Quote biksetan from summer breeze….
::: quand les chiens mordent, quand les abeilles piquent, quand je sens le mauvais.. Remembering stuffs you like & being happy.:::
and while you chew on that; it doesn’t take much to create that meaning yourself….and not if you won’t let me do it for you. Even while I’m sick dammit!!! So I so owe the many many of you! And the amount of conversations lost! First iftar out and I must say, I have missed out on many!! Apologies to aha, nanin and lindot again. and to the many many many others who have tried relentlessly to get me OUT. Sorry guys..it’s a week break and its back to hitting books :) still….InsyaAllah, Eid will bring many other opporturnities. I owe the 3 terrors BIG time for this coming week so we’ll work something out.
*happy thought happy happy thoughts happy thoughts happy happy thoughts*
powwsters – be bothered already! And hope you had a blast getting older.
Minah gebu gua aka lynn maharet – congrats darl!!! May you muntah *vomit* your way to the 2nd trimester and enjoy it *muahahahah*
Wombat & mrs – another pair of soulmates I see and I spy! We’ll celebrate BIG time soonest
Biksetan! - *sings you are my sunshine my only sunshine* oh! Beware of spiders but don’t kill any will you while playing archeologist? :p
Sham – oits!!! Gua rindu lu but as usual, no news is good news just better if we can have another day out aye? Jom kita jalan raya!!!! Gua pegi rumah lu, then kita hike pegi rumah gua :D the boys not to mention the terrors will definitely hate me already after the hike from telok blangah to woodlands….
Hugsy and the missus! – spied you on multiply! And congrats with the incoming! It is a mat or a minah? Pray that both of you well…..
More happy thoughts? Hrmmm……I hope I passed!!!
Stay sane,
jahatamyemeelea
I saw the gals for iftar and a trip to sma to check out the degree programme the have there. I kept repeating 20 thousand dollars much the the chagrin of the ladies. There was ms. Mar the young and ambitious librarian. Then there was giggly and very much tickly ms.nadiaH who came JUST in time for ifthar and of course our jaunts will not be complete with ms. Sanee the seriously insane policewoman in disguise as a paper crazy student *mueheheh* who came like at 730pm and saved me from seriously ransacking next door 711 for a blarrdy lighter. Yeaps….yours truly has started her smoking BUT I am very much trying to lay it low. Because yes..after that bout of being seriously ill, we all need to take care of ourselves a wee much better :D we had a lousy and noisy iftar at tong seng just opposite bugis but it was nice to meet up and fire the rage of enthusiasm for higher learning. For all the reasons we all have for taking up the diploma and contemplating the degree programme it was nice to humble oneself and bask in the ideal glory of others. Refreshing to say the least, because suddenly not making sense was serious making a lot of sense.
We all suddenly wondered aloud why each of us is doing the deed. Switching from a diploma programme to a degree is serious major mojo to contend with. Then a sudden epiphany! From current book in bag, “ It would be sane now NOT to be an emperor of one idea; to start from the position that everyone is right from their own point of view; and to take for granted that everyone is more confused than they seem. Havoc is always wrecked in fast cures for confusion. The sane believe that confusion, acknowledged, is a virtue; and that humiliating another person is the worst thing we ever do. Sanity should not be our word for the alternatives to madness; it shoud refer to whatever resources we have to prevent humiliation.” – Adam Phillips, Going Sane. A bit of truth there? Aren’t we all the selfish bastards we are born to be? But hey! We shouldn’t go crazy for wanting and desiring for meaning. Please let’s not bring genetics into this or religion! I am trying to stay coherent here *haha!*
But it was the lingering question of the nazi’s and their past brutality that clinked and d clanked much in my brains. I did read about those Nazi experiemnts. All those senseless and nasty evil ones they did on the jews. What was their motive? Why so extreme?! And so creative some more..but on the whole it was the mental experiments that lasted throuhout history and how it premeated layers upon layers of people and not only of jewish descendants nor of origins. It affected us colelctively and universally, most definitely. I once read, Victor Frank’s book ‘Man’s Search for Meaning' while doing research on Logos. 'Logos’ is the the greek word for ‘meaning’ and found it very rewarding. It was a gripping account of his time in a Nazi concentration camp and of his fellow prisoners who either devloped a survival mindset or simply gave up on life. Frankl apprecaited the multidimensional nature of humans and while he didn’t deny that biology or conditioning shapes us, he insisted that there is room for free will. We are able to choose to develop certain values or aprituclar course in life, or to retain our dignity in difficult situtations. Excerpts:-“What I term the existential vacuum constitutes a challenge to psychiatry today. Ever more patients complain of a feeling of emptiness and meaninglessness, which seems to derive from two facts. Unlike an animal, man is not told by instincts what he should do. Often he does not even know what he basically wishes to do. Instead, he either wishes to do what other people do (conformism), or he does what other people wish him to (totalitarism).” So as not to confuse his theory with the existentialsim of Sartre or Camus, Frankl wanted to convince people that life will always have meaning. Even if it is not yet clear what it is. We may not discern or pick on a its meaning in difficult or painful situations until later, when we have grown as a result of what happened. Easier said than done when in this age and time what we all chase after is ‘closure’ the simplicity of having it done and away with. Its over, NADA…KAPISH! But how many of us take the time to think about the courage, the quiet strength of sitting it through. Of bawling ones eyes out and feeling better that you did because you realised that through it all…you are still alive. Each person, he wrote, comes into life with a unique set of potential meanings to fulfill. It is up to us whether we decide to grasp these meanings and accept them, or try to avoid them. There is no ultimate “meaning of life” or why we want to do or have to do. Only individual meanngs of lives of individual people. And boy did I have a headspin while I was sick. But bleak situations don’t necessarily do that. A perfect sunrise could give you the inspiration to hunt for many more. A soft blowing breeze may whet your appetite for the chill of the mountains? Be careful of bears or rather monkeys then. If you are like most Singaporeans and have only encountered animals in the zoo *hehe* so how the hell all this get tied with and into the jews and the nazi’s and concentration camps? Errr….blame it on the trailing effects of the drugs :p but *ahemssss* please do a twirl and ask youself if we are not living in a Nazi camp right now ;)
So even though muddleheaded and very much so disorientated last weekend. The sleep, the rest and okay the drugs helped to bring back a sense of equilibrium that I so desire. The zest is slowly creeping up and although I see no meaning in episodes of humiliation I see and taste at work, I am reminded yet again, how fragile we each hold our lives on tether to. And what for? The concious acceptance of suffering or fate can be transformed into one of our greatest achievements. So the nazi’s….didn’t they have anything better to do than meddle with other people’s minds? Believe it or not but the legacy of the nazi’s tortures are still very much alive. Subtley it has premeated our daily lives in silence and killing every little nuace of free will we have. Any oppressive enviroment will do just that. Kill you softly or gently with much worry about freedom of speech, healthcare and the care of the aged. In midst of the young chasing after paper after paper, our natural compassionate nature to understand and give support without prejudice is slowly but steeply eroding our sense of humanity. So onward we march gals!! There is yet much to acclaim for. Don’t let the numbers or time and critism bog you down. What matters most is that you empower yourself with the tools and stay determined on course to do what every little thing we can to make this life better for everyone. The point of melding what you have with what you want to apply to life is tricky but we will all get to the point soon enough. See you guys for another round of serious and not so serious mental jaunts before class. And be the riot you are! No one cares really :p we have the law on our side *points to ms.sanee* albeit she can be very ham-sup or seriously uncensored for your both very young ears. But that is life….all about preparation darls. We all are going to die but how we will end it ultimately can still be a choice. None but your’s…..errrm…..okay I think I’m a bit off here but we can shove it in more next next Thursday?
Quote biksetan from summer breeze….
::: quand les chiens mordent, quand les abeilles piquent, quand je sens le mauvais.. Remembering stuffs you like & being happy.:::
and while you chew on that; it doesn’t take much to create that meaning yourself….and not if you won’t let me do it for you. Even while I’m sick dammit!!! So I so owe the many many of you! And the amount of conversations lost! First iftar out and I must say, I have missed out on many!! Apologies to aha, nanin and lindot again. and to the many many many others who have tried relentlessly to get me OUT. Sorry guys..it’s a week break and its back to hitting books :) still….InsyaAllah, Eid will bring many other opporturnities. I owe the 3 terrors BIG time for this coming week so we’ll work something out.
*happy thought happy happy thoughts happy thoughts happy happy thoughts*
powwsters – be bothered already! And hope you had a blast getting older.
Minah gebu gua aka lynn maharet – congrats darl!!! May you muntah *vomit* your way to the 2nd trimester and enjoy it *muahahahah*
Wombat & mrs – another pair of soulmates I see and I spy! We’ll celebrate BIG time soonest
Biksetan! - *sings you are my sunshine my only sunshine* oh! Beware of spiders but don’t kill any will you while playing archeologist? :p
Sham – oits!!! Gua rindu lu but as usual, no news is good news just better if we can have another day out aye? Jom kita jalan raya!!!! Gua pegi rumah lu, then kita hike pegi rumah gua :D the boys not to mention the terrors will definitely hate me already after the hike from telok blangah to woodlands….
Hugsy and the missus! – spied you on multiply! And congrats with the incoming! It is a mat or a minah? Pray that both of you well…..
More happy thoughts? Hrmmm……I hope I passed!!!
Stay sane,
jahatamyemeelea
2 comments:
ohhh tidak!! no muntah pls!! give me headache-nak-mampos anytime!!
thanks ye..doakan lebih2 hehehe
tadi i nampak tangan baby 'garuk' pipi..cute nak mampos!!! weeeeeeeeeee!!
*hikhikhik*
InsyaAllah sumer selamat amin :)
and aper lagik!!! sebok2 lar pie saner dok pk namer baby, baju baby, susu baby, bilik baby, skola baby! :D pokoknyer welcome to the mommy's club and jangan lupa - sexercise mau lebih after give birth nanti ;) or best way to lose all those post natal weight is to BREASTFEED!
*hugs*
ps: tengok baby yg tiut222222222 selalu *ehe ehe ehe*
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