Not for the faint hearted or ignoramuses…

jahatisme: heard about the commotion and i dare you to conclude that its me who tagged you wrong. i dare you to do an ip check

Shakirah: IP addresses are stagnant. The only way I'll ever know is if you admit it

With that as a reply I conclude that some people are just too HUGE (literally too) for them to admit it when they are cornered or challenged. It is people like this who waver and shirk away when all that is needed to win the war is a solid punch. Too bad….like poww said “takde challenge”. I was erased from liza’s tag board, which is no surprise. I even expected it because why would she ever, ever acknowledge my presence but only in forms of near misses ;) as she did before even when I openly attacked her in rantnstinky. To prove that you are a bigger hearted person or more educated by simply giving in? Play cheat siak!!! Even better I think the next stand of defense is ‘can’t be bothered let God deal with them, we shall pray and hope that they get their just desserts’….tra la la la la~ or you wanna still be hero and meet me in person to tell me you do not believe me and I’ll have to just admit to the charge because you ‘assumed’ and did not conclude and to back yourself up a bit more you add, “What you're doing now, you're defending a friend lets say. I did the same with Liza. That alone makes me ugly? If that remark came randomly never mind. But it came right after I mentioned Liza in my previous post. So the not stupid part of me tells me it has very much got something to do with those people whose name she mentioned.”

Hilarious the self-parody, pity the play of words didn’t come out exactly right.

Why then do we have so much respect for the judicial system? Is justice really blind or has it always been the people working for and with the system that failed many innocents out there, maybe rotting in prison for something they didn’t even do. May I remind ms. Aphrodite that it is never random what you choose to write, say and do. And why is it so difficult to prove emotional unbalance or plead insanity because it is too easy to say and play the part of victim and there are only so few of those who are willing to go all the way to prove their imperfections no matter what they may be as their line of defense, in hope to clear any misunderstandings. Only then will they truly deserve our understanding and respect. We are blessed with the gift of intellect to help and guide us through our daily lives and hopefully get our kicks for fun and laughter with the kiddy stuff in life and even then we still risk to offend. Not just to take just any form of criticisms as a personal attack on one’s character or beliefs. A hit below the belt deserves another hit below the belt or elimination depending on your personal view of things. Or usually how the game is played in the first place, what are the rules, which sets the rules. Maybe in this case it is all very childish to begin with BUT some like ms. Aphrodite, poww, nyce and part of the audience have respect for the need for CONFRONTATIONS because we believe in what we say, do and think and for what happens afterwards (notwithstanding good or bad) we would want to be made responsible. Dare I say it’s a show of one’s Dignity *salutesallaround*

Case scenario :

Someone calls shark ugly and claims liza has birdbrains and does this under the cloak of annoyminity on the Internet for all to read. If you were either one of them, what would you do? How would you deal with it?

Just based on your reaction it will say much about who and what you’re made of. You are a victim only if you choose to be one : ) but wait! Shark did say she’d be back in awhile :D

Stay sane,
Jahat

Ps: as soon as I got to post this, shark came back with her stand and point of view :) And dite….gua bet anak gua lagik KIUT! :P

Whose the big bigger bigot-est?!

*toot!tooot!!* *toot!tooot!*

my phone beeped and the sms read “think your’re being framed amy…..” and after a wee bit of digging I found out what really the commotion was all about. Maybe my reputation supercedes me but this accusation of flooding ms. Liza’s (saikodelica) and ms. Sharkirah’s (sharky) blog amused me somewhat. She said and I quote,

excerpt:-

“I think its her because she did these things before. To say that I am judging means that you know for sure that I am attacking Amy based on my 'judgement'. Since you like referring to my entries, do more of it and realise that I 'assume' its her, I did not 'conclude' its her. The only reason why I think it is her is because she has done these things before and I have no other reason to think otherwise, yet. For all the things she has said to me and about me before, she has never apologised. But I do take pride in always being the bigger person (which I am literally). So if I know for sure it is not her, then I'll apologize. Noone else thinks its her,only I do. So no reason for anyone else to apologize.”

Earlier when the commotion broke out:-

“….Thank you Oh Sucky-Rah! If not for you I wouldnt have known this particular fact! Keep on enlightening me and telling me things I dont already know yaar? Meanwhile, Rock Suck on babe! You know you're a hell of a sucker! =)I heard the theme is 'childish' so this is my reply. You want more,just leave your actual nick. As of now I'm thinking its Jahat or her bouncer friend. Once I know who it is, I'll rebutt to your satisfaction =)"

If I can remember correctly and please refer to www.rantnstinky.blogspot.com (where I write as rant) for proof. Its archived and open to all, I have nothing to hide : ) I did what I did which is to defend myself and have a thing or two to say about what is being written here in blogdom. I am fully aware that what I say and think might be used for and against me so I’m pretty careful about who, what and why I blog about. They say the past haunts you like none other and a hell has no fury like a woman scorned or in this case called ‘UGLY’ and the other ‘PSYCHO’. By now I do hope the wronged parties have got down to the crux of the matter and straightened out whoever’s thought they had all the intention in the world to straightened out but puh-lease…..leave me out of it IF I have NO PART IN IT whatsoever. Liza I can’t be bothered but shark I’m tad disappointed because I had looked forward to a healthy debate sometime in the future, which is why I still read your blog now and then.

I happen to think ms. Liza is a sweet natured girl and she’s going to be a teacher after graduation from UM! Wooo-hooo! She’s going to earn big bucks (3k per month!) and no pushing of trolleys or licky-licky of anybody’s boots for her yes-sir-riee because she is way way above the rest of us who work as part of a flying crew or a sales assistant in a furniture shop like myself : ) to EARN our salary. And yes, I do not know Ms. Sharkirah in person but reading her blog (and I did make positive remarks about some poignant entries) I think she’s a person with a very strong sense of self and is a very loyal friend. I assumed that being a Libran she’s also very fair when it comes to her judgement or callings, never to impose or force down an argument just for ‘sakes’ but sometimes our emotions do runneth over :D and we do things that make us look childish, stupid, high strung and emotionally unstable. Hey! I’m guilty of it too, just look at my vindictive use of cunt as reference to ms. Liza before hehe and my use of 'metroposetan' as reference to ms. dee when clearly she's just taking sides for the sake of taking sides.

So dear friends, if you’re into mama-melodrama check on the blogs and do a flip over ;) it sure did made me sit up and think for a bit, but that’s another entry altogether. Hey! I missed the ‘tudung issue’, didn’t know I participated in one? Hrmmm….or it must have been my over-emo, nothing to do, old maid self that did?!!! >) its www.lamentinglibran.blogspot.com for ms. Sharkirah, then there’s www.polychromatic.blogspot.com for ms. Liza aka psychodelica but be forewarned she doesn’t archive her thoughts. Then there’s me here and here at www.rantnstinky.blogspot.com :D wonder whatever happened to innocent till proven guilty. I’m waiting for your rebutt-ALL ;)

Stay sane,
Jahatamyemeelea

Ps: and I always leave my nick as I am not and never will be a coward.

Fragmented and disjointed…

Ahahahahahah!!! And I had thought she would have erased us from her mind, heart and soul for hating her (hate, hatter, hattest???) or more like being ourselves really. But! I’m shocked as again a selected few were mentioned in undesirable tones on her blog, which has no archives for your info because she knows that it could be used as incriminating evidence against her. Well at least pauster made me laugh me flu away here in ulusiberia *achoo!sniff* with her reply on her blog. I do hope to catch up with both of you soon and shgp aka stinks just told me this very corny but true fact! Pauster, shpg and me are turning two this 1st July! Can you believe she could remember something like that? ;) I’ll try my very best to meet on Monday yeah huns but as I’m still very much under the weather and grouchy, I might have to pass. Unless you guys dun mind a bout of flu yourselves, so tentatively put me on the list and pray I get over this in a jiffy. My plea to get off an hour early today went unreplied and for that I’m going on MC tomolo! >) and I won’t be shy to ask for TWO days! *humph* serves you right for being so mean.

I am wearing a singlet and over that a long sleeved shirt and over that a turtle neck and on top of that a LAMBWOOL sweater and still its freezing!!! Ideal temperature should be about 22 to 24 degrees Celsius but I swear its like freaking 10 here! I swear if I can get a thermometer somewhere and prove to them that they are freezing me slowly I would! My body aches all over and my ribs hurt from the cough fits I’ve been having for the last week : ( and my lips are cracking, peeling from the cold. Thank god I’m back to parkmall next week and there I will stay till next month probably. I have confirmed class to start soon *yeay* and I do hope work is not going to give me any problems or worst tell me I can have the hours off *coughcough* worst case scenario I would have to look for a new job that will be able to accommodate my classes. So keep me in mind if you know anybody whose hiring hehe (I spy shgp going tsk! tsk!) its this cold I tell you! Its all bluey~~ and icky~~ and its making me so depressed. This is why I will never migrate to a cold country! I probably be stuck with flu for life! So unglam..red nose and all :P

My galpal whom I pissed last week smsed me and looks like I’m forgiven ;) *thistimeahem* and happy to report that I won’t have to grieve over the loss of a smart alecky friend with big titties :D I wonder what my elder bro would think of me taking up these classes and ‘kudus’ translates to ‘holy’ in English. Guns and Roses, November Rain is playing on the radio and I don’t know how many more times I need to go pee : ( I can’t remember if I can cook ‘lauk celok’ again cos I haven’t for the longest time. Hopefully when the lights go out on me tonight so will these doubts and dehem this flu!

Stay sane,
jahat

shock recovery...

I angered a good friend last week with a stupid question about her state of morality and got “doesn’t matter…pity about something something..” as reply when I tried to explain and make things better between us, no goodbye, no sign off and poof! I wonder if I should reply? I wasn’t expecting for things to all peachy and back to normal but I hadn’t thought that she could be so bitchy about it all when I made the effort (a few times of trying to explain) to keep damage control to its minimum. Well, even the hottest days cool at the end of each night and I’m hoping that she’ll forgive me. Then…I read with interest an entry made by platypus on the topic of recovery shags. How many people do you know uses sex as a tool to recover from a failed relationship? Would a question like this be categorized as stupid?

Excerpt:

“It has been said that nothing gets you over the last relationship like the next “fuck”, is this really true? Or is it the excuse used to justify self gratification and the healing of ego? (Which if we are honest is what it’s all about) Sex is all about pride and ego. And when the relationship fails, you have to learn to believe in yourself again, to believe you have value, to salve your pride and bruised ego and self-teach that you can actually pleasure another and receive pleasure from the same.Now I whole-heartedly believe you can't have a recovery shag with somebody you have feelings for, that both defeats the purpose of the selfish act and further complicates the issue since it invariably creates the horrible dating situation of the "rebound partner". But is having sex with another the ultimate “marker” that denotes recovery from a failed relationship?And if this is so what about those people who have affairs? Does the affair itself help them recover or rather further hinder the process?” – the platypus

I do not write half as good as platypus but I find the questions he asks himself engaging and I bet we all don’t get many chances to ask these questions ourselves. Personally, I think almost everyone uses sex as a tool to recover from failed relationships! But the question is why? Why do we choose to use sex as a tool to feel better about ourselves? Does it matter if you’re married or not because any relationship is a real as one that is bound by the holy sanction we call marriage. BUT! I guess its because we live in the age where having fuck buddies is common and there’s nothing strange or supposedly abnormal about it. Where its okay to say, “by making mistakes we’re accepting the fact that we are human and therefore susceptible to err and it actually brings us closer to God”. Sometimes wrong does bring us to right but to always choosing to do wrong? Wouldn’t that bring us closer to vice instead of virtue? :S Oh! Then we’ll always give that famous last quote, “I do not need you to tell me what is right or wrong, its my life/grave/problem (delete where applicable) and I’ll answer it for myself and only myself when the time comes.” And what do you ‘say’ to that?!!!

With that I promised myself to be honest and true and not sit on the fence or tactful and diplomatic when my morals are questioned. It could be the other half, it could be the kids, even you, you and you but give me time to paraphrase an answer and get back to you (within 24hrs) and if you don’t receive one it will just mean I’ve never meant to be honest with you from the start. Its all a joke! Geddit? Geddit? :P

Stay sane,
jahat

a revolution!

so the boyfriend aka cylernkilla recently purchased this 3G mobile hp and suddenly the whole world is about what's the difference between 3G and 2G? my guess is 1G? :P but we did our research (in the space of like 24hrs) and have kind of agreed on the kind of technology future we both need (ok...want! want! want!) so look out peeps!! i am back online!!!! or at least i hope to be more in touch then *yeay!* why this need for the most advanced and the latest everything especially now? my reason is for mobility and instantaneous information. then the downside of this will be all the wants turning into needs and the lack of privacy and mass media brainwash (you'll never know) and worst! i might just turn the other half into a junkie hehe...

i have finally decided to go back to school with the constant encouragement (yes even the reverse, perverse, morbid kinds) from *ahem* bobby and shikino, noorticataitai!! and of course the rest of the world.....i have decided to take up *jengjengjeng* a diploma in applied psychology *smirk* bring on your comments! >) i had wanted to to psychiatry initially for obvious reasons! *evilgrin*and soon world domination! muahahahah.....so why not a fine arts diploma or a marketing one or even a design diploma..well, lets just say i need to start somewhere and hopefully with this diploma as a stepping stone; i'm hoping for its ripples to turn into huge tidal waves that could be able to move mountains for when i'm wife, mother, sister and friend and yes in that order :D wish me luck aye?

and today i got a new friend asking if he could join 'jahatism inc'! i could see raised eyebrows (and more actually...eww! you disgusting people!) :P *wavestoLIL* forget the trash i told u in my earlier email hehe because there's no 'jahatism inc' for you to join as the club is already full ;) membership is closed long time ago lah but i can offer you lifetime friendship instead? and in actual fact, i used to know of a real boys club called 'jahat inc' way back when i still thought the world revolves around me and the experience was surreal! everyday was a new adventure and boy did we live on excesses. something magical happens when you attach yourself to a group and if you're accepted as one of them i guess there's no rush like 'i belong' rush to pump up hormones, adreneline and the feeling of electrifying love jolts you awake and you end up partying all day all night ;) *mesinggingelectricyouth!bydebbiegibson* but most of all i kept on to my memories by tagging it to myself so that i will never forget to feel pumped up, naughty but nice hehe just like how we have a pet name for other people and stuff. so when they call me jahat, ahart, heart or usually just minah! something magical happens just like it still does and for always.

so poww is pauster, stinks is ms. shgp, ayincurrent is matdonna, bobo is bobby and orashikino is just shikino, joe is berokman and his girlfriend ms. cicak and the list goes on and on and on but as to how i might be unique to you thats how you'll be unique to me *yeay!!!*

stay sane,
jahatamyemeelea

the veil lifts..

hiya guys...its been quite sometime and whoa did i get a shock when i logged onto the net for a bit of catch up time!! before anything else, thank you for the calls and i am fine by the way. better than fine on some days then its straight down to melancholic melodrama on other days! :P

not that i am complaining. i am glad to be back to the showroom, somehow the stint at the exhibition kinda frooze me up. i am due back to the exhibition this weekend bah! And i mean the whole exhibition was just like a ghost town! the place was entirely filled up with interior firms and the only form of entertainment was exchanging brochures with each other and going for smokes. which is why unlike the last exhibition, i was literally freezing to death (and not to mention awfully bored wallowing in extreme boredom!!). luckily, pen and paper normally works wonders for really really really bored people like me and with all that time on my hand, the other day i actually contemplated life (no i wasn't trying to kill myself but i would have if say i was you hehe) and our purpose this life *toootbadtiming* and that episode resulted to a heated row with a friend. you know how it works, you think of something and you just had to impose your thoughts onto another (what cheek! what liberty!) but lemme tell you this joke first...

Do you know the joke about the English Lord?

An English Lord said to his lady after the morning after their wedding night, "I do hope you're pregnant, my dear. I shouldn't want to go through all those ridiculous motions again.

HAHAHAHAHA ..... ????????

Well, some of you might get it and some of you might not and my point is no one form of communication and interaction is perfect and many a times even with a healthy combo of ways to communicate, it fails to reach to the other positively....well then the least is 'smile'! maybe nothing another says to you makes sense or plainly rude or even downright offensive but a smile tells of tolerance, not joy or approbation (so safe wot). we will always have very different views, and whenever our differences is about to make themselves felt too openly, one of us should quickly smile that smile to the other just to make it clear their friendship was in no way endangered. sms oso can put smiley ok so kenot play cheat ah >) and whenever i'm talking about friendships please auto-ruleout the ship you have with your other half and apply this rule with caution. somehow many of us haven't perfected the art of having our other halves as our bestest of friends. i for one still have overwhelming bouts of "will he understand wot i'm saying/doing?" then decide not to tell him anything or just tell him bits of everything (to confuse? :P) then wham bam...its too late. we're only human and humans repeat vice and virtue, juggling between them till no border is visible and everytime something is repeated, it loses a part of its meaning. Or rather, it gradually loses its vital force, that vital force which automatically, inherently, presupposes meaning. we sought for perfection but we work towards its destruction :( so to me repetition is only a means of making the border visible. and i for one also firmly believes that the line of the border is covered with dust, and repetition is like the whisk of a hand removing the dust :)

*crickcrickcrick*

so i salute you (if any) for being able to overcome the abhored generalisation of repetition as mere imitation and that all imitation is worthless because it is not if you really do think about it. be it for yourself or another and especially for cylernkilla, a promise for never i did make and as did another promise to stay true (yet again) to our promises but know that your forgiveness awoke something in me and i thought that feeling has overdosed a long time ago due to the lack of understanding. so thank you everyone for making my another day as fruitful and satisfying as the last.

stay sane,
jahat

romi & juli

boy meets girl thru a blind date.

they fall in love and promise to be together no matter what.

made promises and lived a blissful blessed love life doing everything and more.

till.....

girl receives mysterious sms from another boy asking for a date.

temptation...confusion but girl said yes to date and didn't tell boyfriend.

girl set night out with other gal pals and selfishly thought she could get away with lie.

turns out the other guy was a test by boyfriend to test her fidelity.

girl cries and tries to explain!

no forgiveness for liars.

she blew his trust and can only lament lost.

boy is hurt and might never recover by lies!

the end.

stay sane,

jahat

update..

i'm still stuck with auntie rose and its been so hard trying to get online. soon next week i will be stationed at suntec city mall for another exhibition (one whole week) and wont have time to log on as weel *poutpoutpout* i didn't get to see the tiny terrors this week and maybe not even next week. got to know from a friend that the green eyed monster left the restaurant and got a better offer somewhere else and i think that is why i won't be getting to see the tiny terrors, its got to be that the monster has found a job working normal rat race hours *dehem!*

my sweet pinky sis-in-law, ms orashikino got through her operation sucessfully and is resting at home *hugs* and my fat bobby will be taking days off to keep an eye on her to make sure she keeps to her diet and get much much rest as possible (okay, you all can puke now). she looks fine cept for a long tube poking out from her neck (draining purposes) and the naughty lymphnoodle has gone and sent for futher tests. we are all hoping that its not the 'big c'.

an old schoolmate found me on friendster! *gasp* and its very heartwarming to read another testimonial from orashikino, it made my day actually *beams* because i don't have time to pat myself in the back sometimes or give myself a lil bit of tender loving care that it needs (words do just fine, you don't have to come kiss my feet). i feel off tangent and my thoughts scattered but the need to place them somewhere in context and have meaning. i can't write when i have people looking over my shoulder ah! so frustrating *hrmmph*

ok gotta go!

stay sane,
jahat