err..PLAINSPEAK just for you and you and YOU..

The Anti-Seducer

“Seducers draw you in by the focused, individualized attention they pay to you. Anti-seducers are the opposite: insecure, self-absorbed, and unable to grasp the psychology of another person. They literally repel. Anti-seducers have no self-awareness, and never realize when they are pestering, imposing, talking too much. Root out anti-seductive qualities in yourself, and recognize them in others – there is no pleasure or profit in dealing with the Anti-Seducer. “

~ The Art of Seduction, Robert Greene

U huh *nods*, I have the above book and I follow his blog http://www.powerseductionandwar.com/index.phtml recently he updated about his latest book collaboration with 50 Cents entitled ‘The 50th Law’. Which I think will be very interesting. More on that on another time. AFTER i add that to my collection. I think zeemonkey would like that book cosh he idolizes 50 cents :p

So yes! Anywho!!! Yes you!!! Che. Anyhowdy *pointspointsJABJAB* I lent you the book (because i believe caring is sharing) because you had issues about relationships and am restarting your engines yet again to play the field. Who doesn’t have issues right? And since you are one of those few who actually read I lent you the above book. Maybe in hopes we could prolong by relating from stuff read. Intresting nuggets could be found in relation and contribute more to our conversations during lepak sessions constructively. Not that I am trying to set up a bookclub or anything but SINCEEEEEEEEEEEEE you told me you read…so read lar!

but what pisses me off or rather really really annoys me is how you try to use the very same laws and try them on me?! or maybe i am flattering myself too much here and cannot tell when you're just being your charming self? *ughhhhhhhhhhhh* but! but! BUT!!! i am using the very same LAW above (bold and highlighted somemore) to hint to you that AM not INTRESTED. and the law clearly states that...........

..."THERE IS NO PLEASURE OR PROFIT IN DEALING WITH TEH ANTI SEDUCER"

in proof!

1) i talk to you about other gals that you tell me about and advise you about how to deal with them right?
2) we always go out in a group right? and so okay we did spend SOME dinners and time ALONE but NO..i do not remember exchange of bodily fluids in *ahems* compromising ways
3) what about when I actually TOLD you off straight EXACTLY what i expect from you and US..

which is :-

thank you che. anyhowdy for being there for me when i am hungry and need someone to have dinner with. also the times you helped babysit the terrors when i am downright penniless and broke to bring them around. then for all the gerek kakis you introduced to me who happen to be very cool and great peeps! and how can i forget our conversations and times where random ad naseum just ranckles us silly and throw both of us out of reality huh? OITS!!! i thought you KNEW i am MOST comfortable with guys?! from waaaaaaaaaaaaay back inschool somemore!

don't you agree that with all above and major HINTS in speech and all that i fancy myself a bloke too? *gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh* and don't give me the crap about guys and gals cannot be buddies lar (maybe some peeps can't handle this BUT we are talking about me here). AND never tell me puhleaseeeeeeeeeeeee that i'm giving you the i-am-playing-hard-to-get thingy with you hor! i am no sweet young thing or seductress that you make me to be??? NOTE: although i might just use this ploy when situation demands that i do. still! i digress!!!! and reiterate! am NOT am NOT! am NOT! *hentak-hentak kaki*

so hopefully i do NOT have to hurt you more than i should bro. it will be so downright hellish for me to bear the guilt man and how can it be fair when all i did is to be myself? :( so cut me some slack will ya and save me from the charming bull that you dish out. seriously bro....gua takbley angkat ah. macam nak pitam jer hehehe...otey otey...lets take today's skirmish ehk? where i did ask if you could buy me a pack of handrolling tobacco from over the causeway. i know its with you and you tell me you do not feel good about keeping it too long with you. apprently you are afraid that you might 'cukai' or go ahead and help yourself to some. i replied with no worries and take some if you like. i don't mind since payday is already around the corner *kaching!* so i'm pretty safe for now lar. you then replied in all seriousness how its 'amanah' (a promise) lar and its a heavy responsibilty lar with serious repercussions if not kept bla bla bla and what not...

and gua macam nak hantok jer kepala lu tau!! kalau gua da cakap boleh..dipersilakan dan go AHEAD and segala macam gua tak lokek lar geng peh replies. aper yang lu nak takot kena sambar petir or kena telan bumi nie??? tak paham arh! so jangan nak step alim-alim dan saya lar jejaka yang kamu idam-idamkan. pasal err...hampeh gua tak PERASAAN ler.

so again..please ehk...save your righteousness and charming ploys (very effective i must say) for those who will actually return your advances lar. it will save you heartache and also add on to your self esteem right? why why whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy do you want to go with an ANTI-SEDUCER as i have been? or must i stop everything at once so we can avoid misunderstandings?

peh funtart lar mat! menyirap ah darah gua tulis entry nie...pasal entah-entah GUA yang kasik lu SIGNALS ehk? eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

TOBAT ah!

say sane,
jahatamyemeelea

ps: bad bad bad monday! *terbalekkantoilet*

Resistance is futile..

Is this another return of an irritating work mate? Why why why????????? Just when I thought I had gotten rid of all the kambengs (meaning goats – in reference to their super silliness and head butting stubbornness!) another one comes along and goes bleating around me and consistently tries to rack up my nerves! Sheesh..and I try to be zen about it but I can’t so ta-daaaaaaah! Here goes in trying to divert my anger focus on other stuff:-

The King of Pop died today at age of 50-51? So saaaaaaaaaad! It was the first thing that I heard when I switched on the news this morning to jostle myself up for the day. I haven’t been sleeping properly due to the happy pink pills and the hard workouts and major reading hasn’t help much. See! That’s why they don’t work (at least long term lar) and you get quite dependant on them *heeeep!* then I wonder if terror one knows this because they have been missing since Tuesday. She loves Michael Jackson! Yeaps, phone is cut again (temporary!) and as I replied to mel, “Same prob lar, bad finance management. Why? Got sugar daddy or mommy to pass ehk?” >) and I conclude its either they won’t answer my calls because they have caller ID or they have gone on a holiday of sorts. Weird because terror 1 did ask if I could send over junk food during this week and chill out *happytotshappytotshappyhappytots*

Packed bag for soccer practice today and then pillaged the pile of clothes for something decent to wear to work. I know copying has been said to be the most flattering compliment but ms. Bijik is getting err....too close for comfort (right up to the same styled speckies) *UGHHH!* so I need to disrupt her pattern a bit. I wonder if she would start wearing undies out, if I did. *ponderponder* glad that I have spare \umbro/ boots because as I had already earlier predicted, my white Nike pair hasn’t been washed and they look now brown with specks of white. I deliberated over t-shirt color and then screw it all by picking up an all black ensemble. Boots-sock-shorts-tee- ALL black! Hrmm….well, we are close to little India what and I don’t mind playing referee once in awhile *hurhurhur* keys, books, toiletries, ball, wallet and all trash checked and I left humming heal the world to myself. Maybe today if the mamak falls asleep again we can sneak into the ladies and take a quick shower after training. Apparently, we (the soccer players) CANNOT use the toilet! And I have in mind to check out why. Last Wednesday, we were noisily chased way by the mamak to use the one at the pool instead. Haz nearly got into a boxing match with him just by asking “then where? “.

It’s still damn too cold in the office now *brrr* and so bright and sunny outside! I ate fishballs and sat under my favorite tree for lunch. Didn’t do much reading but listened instead to loaded tunes from my phone. I skipped all songs that were NOT about ‘getting over IT’. In between I laughed at recordings done by terror 2 which were funny! And mused about my self depreciating conversation I had with IT this afternoon. The poof! IT replied to a very caustic tag I had made *FINALLY* and the closure sought (by moi???) has been reached. But I know it’s too soon to congratulate myself as for all I know it could just be another repetition of old patterns so I have to be very disciplined in minding my progress. We wouldn’t want to spiral or jinx this mild lift off do we? Proven once again how super egos work, IT replied only when IT had a chance to in turn to be the ‘forgiving one’. And who rejected whom again nie? *yeakkkdish! nak ajer gua pushkick tapi tak brutal maseh sabeeeeeeeeeeeeer*

The weekend looms ahead and I have decided to give the pilot a go! He emailed me last week to say he has a trip back and asked if we could meet :p okay please roll in the ‘materialistic bitch labels’ over. I do have a thing for pilots what! And I am lucky to have met quite a few. Although the best looking one was later found to be unavailable *dehemit!*. But I didn’t mind too much then because I was attached hor~~ see, me is believe in one man womang thingy *strictly*
i find it confusing for myself to "belek-belek, pilih-pilih orang macam durian" *sniggers* i guess its alright to line them all up like ducks in a row but not me :) And it’s about time I try to open up a bit right???

ERRRRR *drumrolls*.....But NO to saper –saper yang sebelom ini kena reject STILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL. Nie bukan soal jual mahal ke soal gua materialistic ke haper lar..tapi chemistry beb..chemistry !!! Dan juga, dating seorang pilot gives me the freedom to sloooooooooooooooowly (distance is advantageous) thread water and see if I can once again breathe in the pheromones and want to actually consider procreating *LEGALLY* muahahahahaha >D

Okaylar, gua kerek!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Memang per :D babtue lagik adopting ‘sombong kuali’ mode.

Stay sane,
jahatameyemeelea

ps: this is not a goooooooooooooooooooooood Friday….i prolly have grinded my molars halfway! Beroks arh!

better than a wet tshirt contest..

i can't wait for 5.30pm! its cold and queit at the office *obvious siak* and today i have BOLA. mauy thai got cancelled because zeemonkey is involved in the asian games haperkejadah so no kicking around for this week. dehemit! so brought gear for soccer instead and i spy its still drizzzzling ler outside.

i'm not worried about getting wet lar and am looking forward to sliding around chasing after the rest. there's more gals joining in the fun today! woohooo! *cartwheelie* and must must make mental note that THIS is soccer and NOT tomoi *hurhurhur* also, apparently coach azahari spoke to captain melly that he is thinking of registering the team for the upcoming FAS women's league! *GULPSSSSSSSSSSS*

i can hear the gals now...what? and get thrashed again?? we even rejected friendlies! :p but no worries..i must explain to the gals that we are joining because ITS FREE *muahaha* otey, actually i really do not know if this is sad or evilly happy news. why free? its a major league (OITS! its Football Association of Singapore hor!) and do you know how much some teams pay to FORM THEIR OWN leagues???? i am guessing that since it is organised by FAS most teams are reserving this moment to go for glory for when each team is at its peak. hence the attitude lets win all otehr leagues and THEN pay to win in the FAS. Who knows, one might even get selcted to join the national team sey! *giggles*

i told melly i'll talk it over with the gals and coach tohari today about it and see what he says. its good to know that attendance is on the rise and the gals are more feeling the groove afetr the slump before. i also think why not if its free right? must show support for FAS what and it's be good practice for the gals as well. we would get to size up the rest and also put our mettle to test. i wonder if marine parade has managed to replace thier womens team and if the fates be so funny *i know you gusy are* and possibley face a game versus marine parade?? *LOL*

crys just called and asked me if i got extra pair of boots? Oi! i am at work lar citot...and i already have been teased about the size of my bag siak. so manjalemak everything also ask amy if got spare. just cos i always have spares! now am thinking nie....i packed white shorts, and white boots! *slapforehead* and i left my reebok sports back last week at the shower room *eeeeks!* will it be more of mud wrestling today than anythingelse? knowing how waterlooged the field cna get and why oh why did i throw away all my bee dees training bras siak! alconsperm today err..cold? *arghhhhhh!!!* the worst evar mistake is boots in white siakkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk....i BLAME melly! she thought i'd look cool in white boots when she bought them for me when she went on the trip to states 2 months back. ishkk....another thing to do today...

wash boots and then go hunt for sports bras......lucky i got small neh-nehs heheeheheheh

stay sane,
jahat

ps: joined the prepaid bandwagon..ok so i got issues in managing my finances lar! and it's only temporary so don't panic. anyone wanna 'helep' me with my fiances hehehe. we can trade! i know how to massage with minyak lintah! *gagagagagaga*

Busy with whattttt??

And my answer is always the same, “dunno”. Which is annoying but I find myself so bushed sometimes that the minute my right foot enters the door, I’m already rushing to bed. So forget about asking me out for TT session or whatever have yous once I have confirmed I’m home.

Honestly, I am a lonely basket but my buddies always give me the facepalm and reason how I could be lonesome when I have so many friends. This is the irony of the extrovert introvert *haha* where one can have many many friends but lonely still. In other words, desperately seeking soulmate lar! :p so desperate that I asked my best friend to go ‘steady’ recently. His reply?...”I can only answer your question when I see some actions.” WTH! No offence taken of course but he was obviously ruffled. He ranted and raved and I was confused for a bit but I know where I stand and I could understand the phobias and stigma attached to agreeing to ‘seal the deal’ with me. Horror of horrors huh? It’s not like I asked you to marry me what! But he knows me to well and understood what was being asked for and in his way tried to ‘politely’ decline. Dehemit! Now best friend has decided to go the way of the poof! Which is to disappear lest he jinx my intention of finding true love or some whack shit? Well, I tried and took his refusal in stride. Hey, I’m cool like that you know :)

So, this rejected went dejected to the fields of Farrer to kick some balls. One must know how to deal with stuff like this without resorting to self inflicted violence. Thank god for the school holidays so football training has increased in frequency. Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays there’ll be training in the evenings and since I finish pretty early (I start earlier mah) I could just about make it to Farrer park where Coach Tohari and the boys will be already roughing it out. Beds agreed to partner me that day and thank god I brought my kit to work in cases of emergency like above. We arrived and kit up, beds had to wear the smelly bib and we played with the boys. As you know, football is a “gentelman’s game” so the boys (or men???) tried to avoid passing, tackling or didn't even want to try look in our way. Coach had to scream at them to pass to us. I just went for thier legs all the time in retaliation :p Shy shy I think but it was no sweat beds and me because we play with boys all the time. All in all it was still a good workout and since IT was TGIF and I didn’t want to go back to sleep; I convinced beds to let me tag along to go pick up some shoes from her friend in town. I had earlier planned to visit kidd at her new place but there were no takers. All the same I sent a mass sms to all my footie kakis and told them that we’ll be chilling out random till late and anyone is welcome to join.

We showered (yes gals!!!! There is a shower for gals at farrer park dardey) and made our way to locate Felicia somewhere in boat quay. We got lost and made turns around boat quay AND Clarke quay SO in the end Felicia HAD to hunt for us instead. Lil dee, stephie, kidd and lina replied and said will join us later for supper and or whatever so we waited for the rest at Clarke quay to chill abit up and wait for the rest. They came, they saw and we all smacking loudly air kissed each other and then decided to head down to boat quay for the tarik. You cannot imagine how either of these places changed! I felt old but! Hell yeah! i do not look old hor *muahahahaha* so anyway, steph left to join her frenchie roomie and then beds had to head home in case she turn into a pumpkin :p left with lil dee, kidd, lina and me to push the limits of the humid night further. Kidd suggested we hang at istana park, dhoby ghaut where the skaters roam and we all agreed to walk there. I suggested we take a short cut hiking up Fort Canning (it was already 1am siaked) since they haven’t been up there themselves before and I could show them exactly where I worked. Lil dee jumped at the appearance of a wee frog and I was asking myself why the hell did I suggest this route???? Because it IS DAMN creepy lar the place at night, ESPESCIALLY since I already know that there is a kramat (its GRAVE lar!) in Fort Canning. It was not called the Forbidden Hill for nothing before *gulps* and I kept steering the gals away from the lanes leading to it. making it easier to avoid was the fact that paths leading to it are not brightly lit. we managed to avoid it *phew* and they asked me to show them where was the Registry of Muslim Marriages (ROMM), which was close.

There we discovered a durian tree right in front of ROMM and while trying to make funny of the damn scary already situation we took pictures with the small durians that littered the ground. While I tried to ignore the prickling sense of all my hair standing on ends! We were taught not to ‘tegur’ or rather make any mention of strange and scary things so we still carried taking pictures with my phonecam. Lil dee and kidd were pretending to be runaway brides haha and we were trying to get a shot of them trying to break into the ROMM. Beside the entrance is a vending machine and somehow I was trying hard to avoid looking there. We took a few shots before I declared that my phonecam sucks bigtime with nightshots, so we should make a move already.

I turned to my right where we came from and that route didn’t feel so right. I looked to my left where the is an UNLIT path (darrrrrrrrrrrkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk mauts) to the spice garden and it didn’t feel right as well so I tried to convince the gals to slide down the steep slope in front of us *muahahaha* leading to the road below. GAH! Lina just had to suggest to use her sony ericsson phone to RETAKE the shots. Ho hum…I sad okay. Lil dee was trying to strike pose and I SAW her taking a double take just then. Her face all ashen and panicky when she happened to look towards the vending machine. *uwaaaaaa* I maintained composure and then lina nudged me. I said ok go! WE all FELT it and SMELT it!!!!!!!!! I insisted that the slide down the slope will be fun! But lil dee insisted on taking the spice garden route. I muttered some prayers and we walked through it quickly. The smell of cloying frangipani greeted us and since it was NOT too strong indicated that IT was quiiiiiteeeee near. My heart was pumping overtime man! We reached the main road and it was only when we could hear music from timbre a local pub hangout somewhere close did I manage to breathe normally. Lina then whispered to me about a black black figure when I told her to shut her trap immediately!

Arrived! Istana park is SMACK in the middle of a busy busy main road so PHEW. No worries about close encounters here *huuhurhur* There were some like us too just there hanging out and with our drinks and keropoks we settled down at the istana park to lepak. Wah! I felt 16 heehehe…the next time I checked my watch it was blaardy 6 am already so we all shared a cab home. Good thing I wasn’t working unlike the three of them >) Lil dee headed home with me since she stays ON the other part of the island and I think she can fit into my used-to-be-FAT pants. We wear about the same shoe size so it was settled. If they don’t fit she has to haul her ass back to jurong herself. i snoozed away the whole Saturday afternoon but I got another surprise, the terrors suddenly cancelled their trip up to genting. Apparently their papa told terror 1 and 2 there were no tickets but told terror 3 that she has to update her baby photo in her passport before they could make the trip *whatever~~flipshair*BUT ka-ching!!! he’s going anyway to malaysia with his wifey so the terrors are left all alone with the lazy muthafarken maid for the weekend. There goes my PLANNED weekend again courtesy of the ex *^@*^*$^@($&($&@)*$@)$&). Where can i get a sitter at this hour?

Budget was tight and I CANNOT cancel Sunday training anymore than I could grab a cab and haul them to be with me. Terror 1 was getting emotional and was crying and raving mad. She wished she was dead and amongst other things wished that we didn’t divorce. Fooooooh! It was 1030pm already and I had to keep calm and coaxed terror 1 to fix something to eat. Hungry people are angry angry people. Guess what? The maid told the kids she don’t know HOW to BOIL a hardboiled egg! I even gave specific instructions but the maid chose instead to turn in at 11pm. My blood was boiling by their 20th call and it was already 130am. They made much noise so the neighbor downstairs made a trip up to scare them. note please that the miad refused to wake up. The emotional wrestling over da phone continued till I convinced terror 1 to raid the kitchen to see if we can try fixing simple recipes with whatever was available. Terror 1 listed all the stuff and we settled on bread, butter, cheese, parsley and bits of pepper. I trust her with the microwave and like spies they worked supper with stealth in case they wake up the maid. Tummy is full and I told them to park themselves in front of the telly and try to doze. At one point I think I did threaten to call their dad immediately and demand an explanation for all this crap! But that was merely a slip of course. I knew it will only make things worse for them.

Finally. Sleeeeep. Time check 2am. Terror one called AGAIN! at near 3am to complain that the maid woke up and switched off all the lights and telly and forced the kids to just lie down in their bedroom. Again inducing hysterics from all the terrors. At that point of time, I WAS really tempted to GET over and KILL someone. Luckily, I managed to appease them by promise of better tomorrow. So after soccer training last Sunday, with help from my school buddy we kidnapped the terrors and spent the day at the beach. Needless to say by 11pm I was a walking zombie. Monday went uneventful; I was already in bed just as the news came on. And my friends WONDER I busy with whattttttttttttttt?

Sleep lar.

Stay sane,
Jahatamyemeelea

p/s : today terror 1 called and asked me about a hotel “PUTERI PAN PACIFIC”. I told her it is in johore bahru and I thought she wanted to tell me the coincidence of the hotel having the same name as hers. I asked why before jumping the gun and she replied sarcastically, “orh! So papa must have stayed there lar cos he said he go mesia to go hospital!” Then I replied, “Good lar, let them be honeymooners so I can see you more often”. Terror’s reply, “ada anak honeymooooooooon aper??! “ I rest my case *ziippppppppppppp*