the weekend...

after a terrible night on friday, i popped a happy pill to rest. woke up and i was determined to not let the days past affect my decision to fight for my beliefs. how flawed am i as a human being to not fear infidelity? i'm just the jealous type ;) no no like to share....my feet felt heavy but a picture of hapiness awaited me in yishun. we were to spend the day at sentosa beach!

we finally reached destination by 4pm and it was too short! but the 3 terrors as always were just as happy and excited to go for another adventure! we spent the night at sham's who hosted me and the 3 terrors at telok blangah. and it was great relief! i didn't think i would make it back to yishun with "are we there yet x 100000000" ringing in my ears all they way back from sentosa to yishun. sham made it possible for me to make up for the short time spent at the beach by having a movie night with kids. all eight of us cramped in the lving room, lights out and screaming our heads of watching 'final destination 3'. it was funny too because there were boobies flashed during the movie and it was cute to see how 'soooooome' of the kids quickly shut their eyes to avoid the nudity *naughtynaughty* sham's three boys plus my three terrors took to each other fast and even though plagued by nightmares that night, it was FUN! sham and me spent quality time in the kitchen till 3 am after the kids slept nervously huddled together, gaining strength in numbers to fight the oncoming nightmares *hehe* we both succumbed to fatigue and greeted the next day at 12 noon! breakfast was french toast with nutella or peanut butter to be washed down by milo. then it was tv time till a trip to telok blangah hill for more morbid playtime. we just had to go up the hill where they found the murdered girl's body :D

took a bus to outram mrt and then terror 1 and 2 learnt how to buy tickets for the train ride. terror 2 amazed me by being such the tiny gentleman. he carried stuff and behaved the perfect boy! *gush* and terror 3 took her afternoon nap on the train. she droooled!! and then we rewarded ourselves with drinks from 7 11 before dinner at kak tina's where towards the evening, i lost my temper at terror 1 because i was ready to faint from tiredness. bobby and shikino being the darlings they are helped me with the kids back to hougang and *phew* it was back home to catch up with me time. after MY movie about fidel castro, i switched on the pc to blog on my feelings about the movie. you know fire in da belly stuff on politics, humanitarian issues and passion. docu was directed by oliver stone and smack i ran into bibik baiyu on msn! so i forgot about what i wanted to blog about *sheepish* da fire got doused by my sexcitedness brought on by my convos with bibik *waves* somewhere from inside, the embers still glowed but maybe another night. i am waiting for the room to cool before i slip under the covers to rejuvenate myself for another work week. sexcited about new books to read coming my way! jujitsu! archery! HORSE RIDING!!!!and reflections of friendships solidified by compromise and honesty. trust is built on the experience of being real about yourself and even if i don't believe in your convictions, i will not judge you. you have to get to know me to trust me on this as all the time spent in the world will bring to naught if all the time you were beside me only to drift away into narrow mindedness and past comparisions *lethalcombo* :)

if i were to judge you as someone i know very well by the time spent togther, then you would have been my bestest friend in the whole wide world because we spent almost 3 years stuck together like cojoined twins. yet...sadly, you couldn't even begin to understand how it hurt to know you compromised my trust by lying to me about the very simplest things. i heart you much and will miss your company but i will never bow to forced fear and threats. its just not me, i can only try to tame that selfish part of me to your will but alas....a lie is a lie. and i can't and will not tolerate repeated lies, even under the pretext of how the truth will hurt me. you must know what strong vile stuff i am made off. i marvel at the simplicity of how a heart felt nervous jaunt of 3 hours between fair weathered strangers can be more real than being with you for these 3 years. as i wish you much happiness with those you r-e-s-p-e-c-t with your honesty. i wish for powwsters, sham, baiyu, waty and suhaidah the bestest of my attention, my r-e-s-p-e-c-t and honesty within the short spurts in time we have spent time together. online? offline?? mere seconds? minutes? hours? days never ending to eternity? does it really matter?

do i sound single yet?!!!! :P *muahahahahahah*

*enjoying* melly goeslaw ft ari lasso courtesy of powwsters *heartlu*

Tiba-tiba engkau ada
kemudian engkau hadir
laksana kerdil ku memeluk
lihat aku lebih dalam
di matamu ku melihat
ada cinta yg tersirat
sirami hati merebak

barangkali aku salah
ku terdiam bukan bisu
tahu engkau besar malu
tutupi rasa gelisah

*biar saja waktu nanti
yg menikmati kisah ini
bersamamu aku senang

reff:
belum juga kah kau menyadarinya
akulah yg pantas untuk kau cintai
di bawah langit biru aku bersumpah
diriku tanpamu apa artinya cinta
arti cinta ini sudah menelan waktuku
siang malam hanya untuk pikirkan engkau
sejuta kali aku berani bersumpah
diriku tanpamu apa artinya cinta

stay sane,
amyemeelea