dancing in my head..

jihn once told me that my blog smells of something that reeks in the institute of mental heath :P another saiko's blog *bluuekkk* but it takes one to know one!

the first signs that you are a mental head is when you start to talk to yourself and sure enough, sometimes it does feel like you are writting/speaking to yourself but what makes a blog different is because a HUGE part of you knows that someone or somebody will chance upon your musings and rants to make or not make sense of it and hence you feel at peace and no longer crazy. aren't we all so full of ourselves then? :) we all laughed in class when the lecturer gave us an example of everybody talking to ourselves now (via wireless headphones) and how many times have i caught myself talking to myself *withoutheadphones* and i had to laugh.

a silly little laugh.....

thank god *mumblesalittleprayerofthanks* finally things kinda of settled. i WILL start on the new job on the 27th Dec and soon thereafter will start moving to my bros place. everything that has happened and will happen are for reasons that i will have no absolute idea what there are for, but loads of self realisations there. it all leads to how happy am i or will i be when circumstances change. be it because of external or internal factors. the only theme that stays constant will be the changes that i will encounter for *hopefully* a long time to come. another year will come to close and i will be another year older *accks!!* and who knows if this new job will be a consolation from the last job i left. time will tell and for whatever that comes to past from tomorrow onwards i will learn to be thankful always and keep sane.

that means awhole lotta juggling! and a huge big basket of hope to carry and the determination to follow through decisions made with my heart, my head, my soul *me!* i feel sad though because there will be some things that i will have to lose through these changes. inevitably because this was how i was lead to believe and since now i know better, no more crying over spilt milk! cos there no split milk to cry over wot ;P

"all feelings are good, because thier purpose is to provide us with information, direction and motivation that will help us create a satisfying life" excerpt from book :) so go ahead, feel bored, angry, guilty, sad, lonely, inadequant, stressed, and scared! fulfill each and every need with meaningful purposes and soon you'll see alls well ends well *tonguetwisted!* don't be afraid to question cos thats the only thing that seperate the boys from men and the gals from the ladies ;) but be afraid who and how you question cos you never know how and whats the answer you gonna get. kalau kena lempang then salah orang ler lu tanya kan? dan kalau dapat jawapan bodoh maknanya orang tue ler yang tak tahu jawapan untok soalan lu bukan? *doesalittledance* :D

be prepared, stay sane!

amyemeelea