dealing with it.

the tennis coach remarked over the counter that i was giving a discourse instead of advise to the designer i was talking too. i ignored her and gave her a death stare as i went on with ms. kan-sheong at my desk because it always happens that when i keep it simple they look at me as if i'm speaking in another language! so of course i have to expand it and expound on the subject what!!

but rants about work can be staved off till next time. i was thinking it can be snippets that i can pretend to be drafts for an actual book. i feel the sudden urge to write and update because it that time of the year again! it is nanowrimoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

i believe it has been 5 years of nothing and blah. i can't even put it off to losing my muse too. its all over nada. and if its angst to churn on the creativity juices, then work gives me an overload of pain in the ass and everywhere! i got weened off from jewel (my tablet) from its beepings. its shiny appeal now stale. i haven't been tapping furiously on my simpsons game. thank god that has eased too and i've begun to read on the train again. the terrors lost my earpiece YET again so that could also be a contributing factor. although the last anne rice paperback i picked up was too awful. it is now in the will-read pile but i have a feeling it will be thrown back into never shelf at work.

more so, i think my last brush off with kama (not of the nice kind) woke me up from my routine reverie. our talk reminded me that there is always so much more to hanker for. the drive to try something new and adventure did dim. *gasp* i became boring! i guess i was really into talking to the plants too much. i shunned those who didn't reach out to me preferring the comforts of the swamp as a safe cocoon. it was too easy to switch off completely after every end day.

so its going to be stories.

stories.

i promised myself stories.

if no stories then its....death.

death of the soul and lost of more muses.

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...don't want!

stay sane,

j.

ps: i have tried to tinker with jewel to blog but to no success. also, i still want a semblance of anonymity when i write about work or people. go-blogging with jewel gives me more ease to tag real time photos to my entries which would make it more appealing but no. it is just too risky and won't be funny at all if i can't fuck up your mind with a little tweak to your imagination.

pps: out.of.practice. 

but to hell with it.